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Codependents' Guide to the Twelve Steps ReviewMelody Beattie is the author of CODEPENDENT NO MORE, the book that sold millions of copies the world over and made the word "codependent" a household word. Melody defines codependency as a state where you believe your happiness comes from a specific person, and then you become obsessed with controlling that other person. Very often, but not always, codependents find themselves in relationships with alcoholics, drug addicts, or people with other kinds of self-destructive compulsive habits and addictions. Inevitably, the codependent will become obsessed with trying to get their addicted spouse or "special person" off of that substance. The problem with this, however, is that the codependent does not see that they *themselves* have a problem for being constantly attracted to people who do not want to be helped; also, the codependent often *needs* to be needed and derives their self-esteem from being needed, which would explain the attraction to addicts (never mind the fact that addicts usually give up their addictions only when they themselves want to).So, since codependents often find themselves involved with addicts, it is rather fitting that Melody Beattie has adapted the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous for aid in recovery from codependency and has written CODEPENDENTS' GUIDE TO THE 12 STEPS. Many of the steps of recovery from codependency are very similar to recovery from any addiction, including alcoholism, so not much has had to be altered in this adaptation. To my recollection, only the wording of the "first step" has been slightly changed, wherein the codependent does not admit to powerlessness over alcohol, but rather powerlessness over other people. Melody highlights each Step with examples and stories from her own experience as a counselor, and her way of telling stories is always very succinct, sincere, and non-condemnatory. Another helplful thing is that this book contains an index of many books and guides that are helpful for the person in recovery, including addresses to the different 12 Step organizations.Codependents' Guide to the Twelve Steps Overview
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